I hope this was the right joke to end the hiatus with.  Though I have to admit, I like this joke way more now than when I first started drawing it back in January.  Due to the pressures of unemployment which as of yet are not completely gone, I felt it was best to hold off on creating parodies for a while.  I plan on updating regularly but perhaps not as consistently (< JN will laugh at that) as before, but I will never turn my back on FTR.  It’s my baby.  My plan is to update AT LEAST every other week, and try to update once a week when possible.  Definitely for the next month or so.

For those who have seen Scarface, you’ll probably recognize the quote that is the title of this strip.  For me, when the Central American drug lord tells Tony never to eff him, it was the best part of the movie because it was so hilarious.  The line almost became the subject of this parody, but I scrapped it for several reasons, mainly because I had already started drawing this “little friend” joke before I actually saw the movie.

By the way, I think this movie sucked.  I can understand why people appreciate it for being well made and well acted, but for me it was too long, without any redeeming characters, and worst of all boring for much of the runtime.

Until NEXT week, Keep It Reel!

P.S. – Don’t forget to pick up For The Reels Volume One: First Blood from the InkSpot comics store!

You can also get it as an eBook!

LIke last year and the year before it, I save the first parody of the new year for my favorite film from the year before.

In this case, that’s Inception.  It just blew me away unlike any other film of 2010.  It may not have been as fantastical as it could have been, nor did it worry about answering all the questions about the rules of dream-sharing.  But everything about the movie was top notch, and I was thoroughly entertained.

I haven’t had the chance to see all the movies of 2010 that I’ve wanted to (Black Swan, True Grit, Let Me In) so this list is subject to change – but as of now, here are my top 10 films of 2010:

1. Inception
2. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
3. The Social Network
4. Toy Story 3
5. Hot Tub Time Machine
6. Kick-Ass
7. The Book of Eli
8. From Paris With Love
9. MacGruber
10. Iron Man 2

I’m not entirely sure why I went with Cthulhu for this joke, and I’m not completely convinced I pulled it off.  I knew I wanted to throw something totally crazy and weird in there, and the high priest of Lovecraft’s “Great Old Ones” was the first thing that popped into my mind.   Luckily, the character hasn’t been in any movies that I’m aware of, so he’s free to use for this parody.

Until next week, Keep it Reel!

Hey, I told them I don’t lose my own fake contests.  For those that didn’t see, here are the 3 submissions.

J: http://forthereels.com/2010/12/24/y2cl-1140-ftr-91c-abort-this-mission/

Jon: http://forthereels.com/2010/12/22/y2cl-1135-ftr-91b-everytime-a-bell-rings-an-angel-gets-snuffed/

Me: http://forthereels.com/2010/12/20/y2cl-1133-ftr-91a-the-baileys/

And if you’re wondering why J is saying his dookie tastes like heaven, see this Behind-the-Scenes strip (and the blog) he made about my tardiness a few weeks ago.

Anyway, I’d like to thank J and Jon again for their submissions.  I’d say the contest was a success for what it was.  Next year, I’d like to do what we did in 2008 and invite others to submit their own parodies and I’ll give out prizes and stuff.

This is the first Behind-The-Scenes strip I’ve made in forever.  My resolution for the next year is to crank them out more often, because they’re really fun and easy to make.

Until next week, Keep it Reel!

Today’s guest submission in For The Reel’s “It’s a Wonderful Fake Contest” is by J N Horsley III, the head honcho at y2cl.net.

I’m pleasantly surprised to see his strip contains no Pauly Shore reference, nor any reference to butt secks.  Good job, Mr. Horsley!

When J told me his joke, I was hesitant how he was going to pull it off, since it’s an abortion joke.  It may not have much to do with the movie, or with Christmas, but the expressions on his screen grabs totally sell it.

Check back on Monday for the results of the “contest!”  And have a Happy Kwanza!

Today’s guest submission in For The Reel’s “It’s a Wonderful Fake Contest” is by Jon Anderson.

He broke FTR rule number one: “Thou shall not incorporate multiple movies in one parody.”  In this case, It’s a Wonderful Life and The Dark Knight.  Shame on him!  I know I’ve never done anything like that.

Mr. Anderson was the main artist for JN’s zombie story-arc and is now doing some impressive 3d modeling work for Adventures Haphazardous.

Check back Friday for JN Horsley’s submission!  (And check back later for Mr. Anderson’s accompanying blog post.)

And now, this just in…from Jon Anderson:

There are three things you should always remember.

1. While clown suicides are not necessarily funny, they are often a good thing

2. When someone asks you what “the rules are”, you never say “there are no rules”.  This ends badly and/or funny

3. When boarding a plane don’t worry about the guy in a turban with an accent and maybe a gun.   Worry about the guy with green hair, bad make-up, and a #2 pencil.

So, yes, apparently I broke the “no referencing other movies” rule.  That’s like telling a comedian the only rule is not to make fun of religion, politics, or fat people.

As it has been likely noticed, I am WEEKS behind on AdHap.  Alas, the struggle of a job, the holidays, and two men trying to make babies, but this, and my subsequent “John’s having a baby” comics are fairly easy as I have become adept at using Illustrator.  Have no fear, CGI comics will return after this short commercial break.

It’s a Wonderful Life is my favorite Christmas movie.  I’ve wanted to spoof it for the last several years, but it always got pushed aside in favor of other holiday movies.  Now that I finally thought of a decent joke and drew it, I’m glad I didn’t hold off until next year again.

This is the first entry in the Second For The Reels Christmas “Contest.”  I put quotation marks around “contest” because unlike our first contest back in December ’08, there are no prizes.  And I’m participating in it along with the other y2cl.net guys: J and Jon.  And we’re all spoofing the same movie.  So, the only thing that makes this a “contest” is that J thought it would be cool to attach the word “contest” to this idea of his.

So prepare for two more updates this week.  Jon will post his It’s a Wonderful Life parody on Wednesday and J will post his on Friday.  I predict one or both of their jokes will involve buttsex, and that J’s joke will have Jimmy Stewart break the fourth wall and reference a Pauly Shore movie.  I apologize in advance.

I’m not sure who decides which of our jokes is better, but I’ll let you know who won at the end of the week.  Though, let’s be real: as the head honcho at For The Reels and the decider of at FTR-related contests… I’m gonna win. Even if Jon’s joke makes me shoot milk from my nose.  Even if J makes me chuckle with his misspelling of “Virginia Beach.”  It’s already been decided, by me, that I don’t lose my own “contests.”

Still, I look forward to seeing what they’ve got, and so should you.  Don’t forget to visit again this week!

For some reason, I couldn’t get that oompa loompa to NOT look look like Obama, no matter how hard I tried.  I think it was a combination of the skin color, the hairline, and the face wrinkles.  He was the last character I drew, and the final result made me immediately regret not spoofing the old 1971 Willy Wonka film.  Those oompa loompas were so much cooler.  And their songs were so much better.

Overall, though, I preferred this 2005 film over the old one because it was closer to the book and therefore seemed so much more imaginative.  Roald Dahl was one of my favorite authors as a kid (my favorite story being George’s Marvellous Medicine), and even though Tim Burton made it a bit creepier than it needed to be, at least his film didn’t have Verca Salt’s annoying-as-hell “I Want it Now” number.

Where’s that laugh-track coming from in the last panel, you ask?  Probably from Ruby Rhod’s microphone thingy.  I think that’s where his radio show’s sound effects emanate from in the movie, but I wasn’t 100% sure so I left it out of the comic.

One of the rules I set for making these parodies was that I wouldn’t reference other movies in the joke.  But this strip, kinda like our Harry Potter spoof, does reference another film.  And a TV show, actually.  My bad.  The third panel has a play on a quote from the bathroom scene in Hot Tub Time Machine, where Lou mentions how impossibly black Nick’s ding-dong is.   The last panel references That’s My Bush!, a sitcom by Matt Stone and Trey Parker that ended in 2001.  That show may be a reference to some other show called “That’s My ____!”  I’m not positive.  If anyone knows, let me know.

I’ve always been a fan of The Fifth Element, but I know some people who absolutely despise it, which I’ve never understood.  It’s a great sci-fi action flick, and I love how it never takes itself seriously.

On a side-note, if they want to see a TRULY craptastic film  –  I’m talking SO freakin’ retarded that it might border on good  – check out ThanksKilling on Netflix.  I didn’t actually watch the whole thing, but the parts I did see… I have no words for.  It’s that awful.  But see it anyway.

Until next week, Keep it Reel!  And have a happy Thanksgiving!

Visit For The Reels on Facebook.

EDIT:

To help celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday, I present you the trailer to the ThanksKilling movie I mentioned above.

Click here to view the embedded video.

I wasn’t sure what to write for this strip’s blog, so I just asked my wife and she suggested writing about how much I dislike this movie.

Which I do.  Good Will Hunting sucks.  Balls.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a horribly made movie.  It did win several Oscars.  But when I think of the protagonist’s primary struggle in the story, I just can’t sympathize.  When I watch it I just want to say:  ”Get the hell over it, Will.  You had a rough childhood.  Lots of people have rough childhoods.  Quit being a dick and use that genius IQ to invent some jetpacks or something.”  I mean, the WHOLE movie was about his emotional disorders that he should have just acknowledged and moved past if he was really that smart.

Anyway, the reason I parodied it is because there are a lot of people who do like the movie, my wife included.  AND I needed a filler joke to bridge the gap between my Mission: Impossible joke and my upcoming Fifth Element joke, which I thought were too tonally similar to do back to back.  So look forward to that next week.

I leave you with a youtube clip of Family Guy’s riff on the movie, which was a big influence on this strip.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Until next week, Keep it Reel!

I had two options at the end:  either he’s looking at porn, or he got distracted playing Farmville on Facebook.

It was hard to choose which was better, but in the end, this is For The Reels.  Our specialty is low-brow humor.  So I went with the porn route and I think it’s all the funnier for it.  Plus, I’m not a big fan of Farmville, even though it’s probably the most popular Facebook game.  If I’m going to waste my time playing those, it’s gonna be games like Wild Ones or BRAAAINS.

I never saw the old TV series, but I’ve always been a big fan of the Mission: Impossible movies.  The fourth one, Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol, is filming as we speak.  Tom Cruise may be on the eccentric side, but I’ll be damned if the guy hasn’t made some entertaining movies.  Hopefully, Ghost Protocol is up to par.

Until next week, (seriously this time) Keep it Reel!

Why is it late?  I like to have the movie I’m spoofing in my possession to make sure my drawings are accurate enough.  I don’t own a copy of Mission: Impossible so I had to borrow it from a friend this weekend.  AND this weekend was super busy with Halloween party stuff and taking care of my wife who may have had a bit too much to drink at said Halloween party.  She threw up over 5 times (I stopped counting after that) and had the world’s worst hangover the next day.  She’s adorable.

Look forward to the new FTR next Monday, Nov. 8th!

Happy Halloween!  (I know it’s not for another 6 days, but the next update won’t be till Nov. 1st.)  We like to parody horror films at this time, so this month you’re getting what I believe to be de facto zombie movie, 2004′s Dawn of the Dead remake.  And since we didn’t do any Halloween comics last year, I spoofed Paranormal Activity for you last week.  By the way, if you loved the first one, Paranormal Activity 2 is every bit as creepy.

Halloween has always been my favorite holiday.  Maybe because I love the feel of autumn and all the holiday activities like carving pumpkins and haunted houses.  Dressing up is fun, too.  My wife and I are going as Guitar Hero characters this year, Midori and Eddie Knox, respectively.  It’s gonna be awesome.

Anyway, hope everyone who reads this has an awesome time this weekend.  Make sure you do something, Halloween is too much fun to waste.  So whether you go trick or treating, go to a party, or stay home and watch scary movies, enjoy the holiday.

Until next week, keep it reel!

Yeah, it’s a fart joke.  I think they’re funny.

Understandably, there are a lot of people out there that don’t find this kind of low-brow humor funny.  I think there are even more people out there, though, that laugh at these jokes but are too cynical too admit it.  Hopefully, people who don’t like it remain civil enough and NOT state their wish for gorillas to rape me, as they have in the past, lest they themselves become victims of gorilla-rape.

The original spoof idea was about a prankster demon that drew on Katie and Micah’s faces and pulled the shaving cream gag.  My brother Jon suggested that the sheet movement in the movie was really caused by female flatulence, and I just found myself loving and laughing at that idea more.

I saw this movie last year when it was put into wide release, and it scared the CRAP outta me.  Not at first, really.  My wife, friends and I walked out of the theater laughing and carrying on.  But when I got home and got in bed… and turned the lights off… and lied there with my thoughts… I remember hoping to fall asleep before a demon got me.  I think I held my wife extra close that night.

As far as recent scary movies go, this year’s The Last Exorcism (even though the ending sucked) and 2008′s The Strangers are pretty good.  Paranormal Activity is still probably one of the scarier films I’ve seen in theaters, I think.  Hopefully, Paranormal Activity 2 is just as creepy.

On a side note, I’m thinking we need (want) more Facebook fans.  CLICK THE FACEBOOK BUTTON ON THE TOOLBAR BELOW TO “LIKE” US.  If you love us, sorry.  Facebook hasn’t made a button for that yet.

Until next week, keep it reel!

The original quote from the movie was: “You’ve come to fight as free men, and free men you are!”  I changed it in this strip, since it looks like William Wallace didn’t necessarily come to fight.  Don’t ask me what he came for.  Maybe his plan is to can-can the English to death.

Braveheart has always been one of my favorite movies, definitely in my top 10.  My wife hates war movies, but I keep trying to get her to watch it by telling her that at its core, Braveheart is a love story.  Plus, chicks love weepy movies.  If the ending to this movie makes ME tear up, then I assume it’s gotta be a sure thing for most women.  It’s a shame Mel Gibson went crazy, because he’s such a great, talented director.

This was another comic written by my friend, Sean.  I remember this kind of joke was made a lot around the time the movie came out, but never quite in this way, I believe.  Call it what you want, but a skirt’s a skirt and makeup is makeup.  That’s not to say William Wallace couldn’t kick the living crap out of me, though.

ALSO: THE INKSPOT COMICS STORE IS FINALLY UP. If you’re ever interested in buying a For The Reels book or e-book, go here.  Expect more cool y2cl.net products to show up in the near future as well.

Until next week, keep it reel!

If you’re thinking that the artwork looks really static and simple, I apologize.  I had to crank this sucker out at the last minute with only about 6 hours to get it in in time.  My brother Jon, a DC fanboy, wrote it.

These blog musings are never very timely because I normally don’t parody films until they’ve left theaters (that way everyone gets the joke and nothing gets spoiled).  This is no exception, because the Dark Knight craze is long over, but here I am, about to finally comment on it.  What sucks is that everything about the film has already been said and repeated.

I am glad that all the hype wasn’t for naught, that the film was outstanding, and that it’s gargantuan box-office take will pave the road for more serious-minded superhero films.  Most of all, I’m glad Heath won the Oscar.  Like a lot of people, I was initially confused why he was cast, but I loved the way he took everything interesting about the comic character and just compounded it like all the best actors do.

I can’t wait to see how the new Superman movie, overseen by Christopher Nolan, comes out.  It’s gotta be better than the last one. Out of all the directors in the running, my vote is for Matt Reeves, but I’m still holding out hope that James McTeigue gets the job.  Zach Snyder seems to be the favorite, but I think his work is too stylized.  He’d be perfect for Wonder Woman, though.

EDIT: IT HAS BEEN CONFIRMED.  ZACK SNYDER IS DIRECTING THE NEXT SUPERMAN MOVIE.

Anyway, until next week, folks!

Chicken suit = instant parody.  Just add water.

This strip’s joke doesn’t really comment on the movie itself, but I did think it would be funny to draw James Dean in a chicken suit.  That’s pretty much the only change to the movie here.  In the film, Buzz the bully falls to his death during a “chickie run” (more commonly known as a playing “chicken”) with Dean’s character.  Here’s the clip:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Jon wrote the joke, forcing me to watch the film.  It was better than I thought it would be.  All this time I thought Dean was a legend just for his looks and cool, but the guy was a really good actor.  I didn’t like how the focus of the movie shifted to crazy Plato near the end, but I can respect the film for holding my attention for so long.

Dare I say “remake?”  With the right cast and director… maybe…

Until next week, keep it reel!

If you haven’t seen this movie, then these jokes probably won’t mean much to you.  And if you haven’t seen this movie, you really need to because it’s excellent.  And if you haven’t seen this movie, don’t read any further because I have a anecdote about the film that contains a major spoiler.

When this movie first came to theaters in wide release, I was there opening day, first in line.  When the previous showing ended and people were exiting the theater, I was privy to all their reactions to the film:

“That was a great movie.”

“Thanks for the tissues.”

“Man, Sandra Bullock was a BITCH in that movie!”

“… So the bullets in the little red box were blanks?”

When I heard that last one, I jokingly said to my friend, “Aw great, now the movie’s ruined!”  I had no context to base the “little red box” on, so I didn’t know how true my statement was.

So at the end of the scene where Farhad’s daughter buys the gun, I knew she had gotten him blanks.  Therefore, during the emotional climax of the film, when Daniel’s daughter gets shot point-blank in his arms, I knew she was going to live.  What was hilarious, though, was everyone’s reaction during that moment.  I looked around and saw people crying, people closing their eyes, people looking like they had just been punched in the spleen, people looking like they were crapping their pants – I felt kind of bad for them.  I just wanted to stand up from my seat and shout ,”DON’T WORRY!  THEY’RE BLANKS!!!”  and save everyone from their emotional turmoil.

I didn’t, of course.  ”Crash” is the kind of film that’s supposed to make you feel uncomfortable.  It presents tough situations and forces you to examine your own prejudices.  To that end, I knew this parody had to be a series of racist jokes.  In my opinion, racist jokes are only funny if you’re not racist.  Because otherwise you’re like, “Yeah, that’s true.”   So if you didn’t laugh at any of these, guess what?

… or they weren’t funny.  I dunno.

Until next week, Keep It Reel!

Dear Shyamalan,

“Unbreakable” is one of my favorite movies of all time.  ”Sixth Sense” was good also.  I respected you for those movies.  When I saw “Signs,”  a splinter of doubt entered my mind.  Then I saw “The Village,” and it felt like you took a massive crap all over the face of the respect I had.  The premise was so promising, though, and I thought maybe this was a one-time fluke.  I… I defended the movie to my friends.  I said the ending didn’t overshadow the concept.  But in my heart, I knew it did.  After “Lady in the Water,” I stopped defending you, and suspected you had begun losing your mind.  ”The Happening” is one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen.  I hated it so much, I never saw “The Last Airbender.”  But I did see the trailer to “Devil” 50 times.

And now I know… you sold your soul.  You sold it to the devil right before “The Sixth Sense” to become a success.  Your wish slowly dwindled as you put out more films and evolved into a curse.  And now the devil has forced you to make a movie with his name as the title.  And you couldn’t resist because of that price you paid over 10 years ago.

I want to say, “I hope it was worth it,” but, alas, such deals can only end badly.  I predict poor box-office results, critical pans, and an eternity of pain and torture in your future.

That sucks.

Sincerely,

For The Reels

Like the E.T. parody that was posted late last year, this joke was written by my good friend Sean.  I’m starting to think he’s better at this whole being funny thing than I am, especially since the jokes he gives me are right off the top of his head.  … Jerk.

For those who don’t know, the first of this month was the big relaunch of our parent site, y2cl.net.  If you look on the right sidebar, you see the other y2cl.net sites.  Most of them are even good!

Adventures Haphazardous got a new site design and is starting its new story line where JN and the gang find themselves 1000 years in the future.

Inanimate got a new site design and will actually be co-written by me, just so JN can stop getting called a racist.

Sgt. Blinky and his Brigade of Fantastic also got a new site design and will continue being hilarious.

Be sure to check them out.  JN will be setting up the y2cl podcast again, so you can look forward to that again as well.

Speaking of podcasts, go to the TGT Webcomics site and listen to the interview Kurt Sasso did with JN, Jon and myself.  I answer questions about joining y2cl, what’s coming up on For The Reels, and the 2011 Emerald City Comic Con.

Until next week!  (I mean it this time.)

Aaand we’re back.  Stupid hackers.  I hate you.  Unless you plan on infecting the site with malware again.  Then I plan on bribing you with homemade cookies.  Thanks to JN for getting the site back up, it took a little longer than expected due to some changes we’re making to the archive that will eventually go into effect later this month.

Does everyone remember the scene in The Bourne Identity when he finds all the fake passports and gun in his safety deposit box in Zurich?  I got a devious grin on my face when I thought of all the different things I could have him find in there instead.  In the end, I went with pizza (I think I was hungry at the time), but I’d be interested in hearing what YOU would have put in the box for him to discover.

EDIT: Someone translated this comic into Russian. See it here.

“A poop joke?” you ask.

“Yeah, gorillas are known for eating their own poop,” I respond.

“Oh,” you say. “You are super smart and sexy, Joe.”

“I know,” I say. “But ogle these videos instead.”

Click here to view the embedded video.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Click here to view the embedded video.

P.S. – The story of King Kong, while it may be classic, is really freakin’ lame.  Seriously, I hate these movies.  My wife and I want to shoot our own version where King Kong kills everyone.

Does anybody remember the Playboy page taped to a fuse box in the movie?  It was just so random, John McClane even did a double take when running past it.  I thought it was so hilarious and wanted to expand upon it.

My brother-in-law told me he remembers hearing a rumor about the production that Bruce Willis’ reaction to the porn was genuine.  According to him, someone on the crew taped the centerfold on the set as a gag and it was left in the movie.  (After googling it, I found out the centerfold is 1987 Playmate of the month, Pamela Stein.)

I actually tried drawing my first nude with this strip, but it came out all wrong and was not doing the female form any justice. All the women I draw are ugly, I think, so I just decided to screen capture the actual image of the centerfold in the movie and trace it.

I wanted to use the term “retard strength” somewhere in there, but couldn’t fit it in.

I’ve always thought Chewbacca was mentally challenged.  I mean, look at the guy:

The joke just kinda came about from my longtime semi-annoyance with the look of the character and that sound he makes.

When I set out to write Chewy’s cry in text form, I drew a huge blank.  I googled how to write it, and came across this, this and this, which gave such varied answers as: “rtttttttttttttttttttttt,” “ududududududud,” and “Maaaaaarh!!!!!”

Now, I don’t know about them, but when I try (fail) to speak Shyriiwook, I think of it as a mix of a tarzan yell, growl and gurgle sound.  So in the end, I just tried combining them in text and came up with “Arrguglharrghrar!”  It doesn’t really sound like it, but then again I don’t know what does.  If you have any ideas how to write out Chewbacca’s roar, let me know in the comments.

Donkey waffles?  Sounds delicious!

In  the “What If?” scenario for this strip, I asked myself what would’ve happened if Lord Farquaad relocated all the fairy-tale creatures somewhere other than the swamp.  I figure Donkey wouldn’t have survived that first night, what with his attention deficit hyperactive disorder and Shrek’s extreme carnivorous-ness.  It’s kinda sad because I really like Donkey.  But hey, that’s why it’s called the Circle of Life, am I right?

On a side note, I’m starting to think that none of my blog posts make sense.  See you next week!

I swear it’s not because I’m lazy. (yes it is) I do have legitimate reasons for being flaky these past couple months. (legitimate like lazy) This last Saturday was my wedding reception.  See, I got married in April in Vegas, (just wait until his wife finds out about the hookers) but a lot of my family and friends (by friends he means family, Joe has no friends) weren’t able to attend.  So we had a celebration here that took almost as much preparation as the wedding itself.  BUT, that’s the end of it.  No more planning, no more errands, no more delays.  Ever.  Well, not ever, but for a long while, I assume.

I was planning on getting this next strip up tomorrow, (see, told you he hadn’t started it yet) but I just got the joke down today ($10 says it’s a gay donkey joke) and don’t want it looking like crap. (isn’t that an oxymoron for For the Reels in general?) So come back this Monday as we spoof Shrek!

This post was updated for clarity by jhorsley3.

If you can tell, I modeled the dominatrix robot after Jocasta, for the comic fans.    At first, I was hesitant doing an Iron Man gag because I had just done X-Men about a month ago, and I like to keep things varied.  But I saw Iron Man 2 last Thursday at a midnight showing and knew I just had to spoof the first one.

I thought Iron Man 2 was awesome, just as good as the first.  My only quibbles, which are fanboy nitpicking, are just of the supporting characters.  Black Widow never spoke Russian and never used her trademark “widow’s bite” laser.  Ivan Vanko never became the Crimson Dynamo like I thought he was supposed to.  And Nick Fury didn’t really act like Nick Fury; he acted like Samuel L. Jackson.

However, I loved the story, I loved the acting, I loved the amped-up action.  Jon Favreau and Robert Downey Jr. definitely know how to handle the character of Tony Stark and can do no wrong in my book.  Go see the movie if you haven’t.  I wish I had more hands, that way I could give it four thumbs up!

Yea!  Another parody!  Thanks to all of you who were so patient with me as I prepared for my wedding these past weeks.  Now that I’m hitched, I don’t have to worry about planning anymore and can devote more time to the comic.

It’s been a while since we’ve done an old classic, so here’s a parody of one of the best!  You might not get the joke if you haven’t seen the movie, but this is a spoof on the final scene.  In it, Humphrey Bogart’s character, Rick, just let the love of his life leave on a plane with her husband for America.  He and Captain Renault have a close friendship.  Renault even said he would be in love with Rick if he were a chick.  Needless to say, between losing his girl and walking shoulder to shoulder with the guy he’s going to flee to France with, it’s appropriate for any cynic’s gay-dar to get a few blips.

Last week I spent all my time doing wedding/bachelor party stuff.  And this week I get married.  So times are crazy right now!  Luckily though, JN was cool enough to make a Behind-The-Scenes strip this week (and maybe next week?).

So for this blog update, I thought I share with all of you the details of the awesome, awesome bachelor party I had last Saturday.  First, me and 18 other dudes went paintballing at an outdoor place in Dacono, CO.  It was raining pretty good at first, so for the first game I slipped in the mud, got shot, tried to jump to my feet and run, slipped again, dropped my extra ammo canister, got shot again, stood up, tried to pick up my ammo canister, got shot again, got pissed, got shot again, then left the field to get more paint.  After that, though, the rain cleared up and I had a lot of fun.  They had a real downed helicopter there that we got to defend in one scenario, and a two story building built like the alamo.  I got shot point-blank in the back by my little brother Jordan which left a huge bruise, and promptly ran away from my team when I heard they were about turn on me and do a “bachelor send-off.”  They did manage to shoot me in the chest, ass, and arm, but at least I didn’t end up with leopard-like bruises all over my back like Jon did at his bachelor send-off.

After paintball we went to my future parents-in-law’s house were we drank.  I spent the week before the party building a super sick beer pong table with my best man John.  We made it look exactly like a basketball court, polished and all.  I had bought some orange ping pong balls and marked them to look like tiny basketballs.  One of my friends brought his beer pong table too, so we had a nice tournament going.  I won the first game I played, but lost the next two, so needless to say I was kind of drunk. ‘Cause in addition to that I had a few gin drinks and people kept wanting to take shots with me.  I’m kind of a lightweight when it comes to drinking.  Someone gave me a cigar and I threw up trying to smoke it.  And then I threw up in the bathroom again right before the arrival of the strippers my future brother-in-law ordered.

The strippers were ok.  One was a blonde and one was a brunette, and both were super tan.  One thing I didn’t know about strippers was how much they love money.  It cost $400 just to order them and they’re constantly asking for more money for the duration of the show.  It was a freaky experience for me (not just because I thought I might puke again at any moment) because as the bachelor, I was obligated to subject myself to things you wouldn’t do to a dog.  They laid me down, took off my shirt and put lotion on my chest.  They then had the guys stick their $1 bills to my chest, which soon evolved to slamming the bills onto my chest and even slamming one on my face, which hurt.  My friends are dicks.  The chicks eventually did get all the way naked and they did stick candles in their hoo-hahs, which you couldn’t really see because all the lights were turned off.  And, again, I was really drunk.

After the strippers left, I spent the rest of my night in the hot tub outside.  It was like that movie Hot Tub Time Machine but without all the time travel.  And someone stole my clothes, so I had to try and find them in my boxers and it was freezing.  My fiance drove us home and I passed out pretty quickly.  All in all, I’d say it was a pretty awesome day.

(EDIT: LOOKS LIKE THE IMAGE ISN’T LOADING FOR NOW, J WILL BE AVAILABLE TO FIX THAT SOON. BY “SOON” I MEAN SOMETIME TODAY… HOPEFULLY.  ’CAUSE HE HAS WORK AND SCHOOL.  FOR NOW, CHECK THE STRIP OUT ON OUR FACEBOOK PAGE.  DON’T FORGET TO BECOME A FAN.

IT’S FIXED YOU JERK -j

YOU’RE THE JERK, YOU JERK!!! – JOE

No, your the jerk. Don’t make me do something mean to you! Jerk – J
First person who can tell me the names of each character and movie that is quoted in the panels above (i.e. whoever can google it the fastest) wins a prize of 7 billion internets.

Honorable mention Sam Jackson quotes:

“You know me. It’s my duty to please that booty.” – John Shaft, Shaft

“AK-47. The very best there is. When you absolutely, positively got to kill every motherfucker in the room, accept no substitutes.” – Ordell Robbie, Jackie Brown

“Like Jesus Christ said, “I’m a suffa’ you. I’m a suffa’ you!” – Lazarus, Black Snake Moan

“I should’ve known way back when. You know why, David? Because of the kids. They called me Mr. Glass.” – Elijah Price, Unbreakable

“You tell me where my suit is, woman!” – Frozone, The Incredibles

And every other line he does in Pulp Fiction.

So no update for today, but things should be calming down here soon.  I’ll be able to post a comic for April 12th and 19th, but will probably have to skip the 26th ’cause I’ll have gotten married that weekend.  Then it’s smooth sailing again.

Thanks to everyone for their understanding.  If you’re still looking for laughs, try checking out the rest of y2cl.net.

I had several ideas running through my head when I decided to finally parody “X-Men.”  None of them were actually any good, though, so I decided to go with my foolproof backup plan, which was ask Jon to write it.  He thought of the first part of this strip on the spot, and I laughed pretty hard.

I decided to add the last three panels because I really wanted to draw Cyclops.  ’Cause he’s awesome and one of my favorites.  It always made me mad how the films never really gave him the respect he deserved.  I mean, he played a minor supporting role in “X2″ since he was brainwashed for the majority of the movie, and they killed him 15 minutes into X-Men 3!!!  And then to top it all off, in “X-Men Origins: Wolverine,” they took away his optic force blasts and gave him heat vision, like Superman.  Dicks!!! >:(

</geeky rant>

Here’s my excuse as to why there’s no update today.  You know that time in your life when you’re about to get married and move in with your spouse-to-be and you have to juggle wedding planning and apartment searching and a ton of other stuff?  That was this past week for me.

On the positive side of things, I found the venue for my wedding reception and made the deposit.  And I found a great apartment that I made a deposit on as well.  And Melissa and I spent a whole day registering for wedding gifts.  And I started the never-ending task of preparing 300 invitations.  And I got things set for my bachelor party.  And on and on and on.

The negative side of things, of course, was that I didn’t get the time to work on the strip.   Until the wedding on April 24, I may have to institute a bi-weekly schedule so I can keep my sanity.  ’Cause I’ll be moving here soon, too.

I’m sorry.  I suck.  If it’s not one thing it’s another, huh?  I promise things won’t stay this way.  If need be, vent your frustrations below.

That’s right!  Thanks to Onezumi and Harknell from the webcomic Stupid and Insane Defenders Against Chaos, we have a downloadable iPhone app!  So if you have the hardware, head over to the iTunes store and download For The Reels Central, where you can stay up to date with FTR whether you’re on the run or just have the runs.

Aaand, we’re back with another parody!  Sorry about that, folks. my computer got sick and then I got sick. But we’re both in good health now, so be sure to keep coming back weekly as we crank out more movie spoofs!

If I’m not mistaken, this is the first For The Reels joke that JN wrote by himself.  Normally, his ideas involve abortions, Pauly Shore, or both – but there was something special, different and more tasteful about this one.  It was actually funny, too.  I laughed out loud a lot when drawing it.

Surprisingly, he wrote the strip having only seen the trailer to Taken.  He did see the film later and thought it was really good.  I agree.  Though, any film with Liam Neeson being a B.A.M.F. has to be good.  It’s the law.

Jon doesn’t like it when I use him as a character for the BTS strips (which possibly makes this funnier).  … I think it has something to do with the fact that I made him into a wannabe-asian-popstar. 

It’s not something I originally planned when we started doing Behind The Scenes strips.  His character just kind of evolved that way when we explained his current, one-year stay in South Korea.  For that, I apologize, Jon.  I promise your character will be salvaged by learning Tae-Kwon-Do and kicking our asses or something.

Thanks again to JN for drawing these BTS strips.  Well, not drawing so much as photoshopping.  With some drawing.  Either way, you rock.  Just one more strip until my computer’s fixed and you guys get your next parody!

P.S. – No, Mom, I’m not gay.  JN just keeps inserting these gay vibes into the strips.  I think because he’s gay.  Or bi.  … Possible hermaphrodite…

Ahhh… week two without my computer.  I’m having withdrawals.  Just a couple more weeks and we’ll have more movie parodies for you.

Thanks again to JN for crankin’ out this Behind the Scenes strip.  All I have to  say it is, when I wrote it, JN was humping a blow-up doll of Jessica Biel.  I’m not sure what sick, twisted perversions JN has going on inside that head of his (then again, read y2cl), but this strip has a serious lack of The Biel.

There we go, problem solved.

If you’ve followed For The Reels for over a year, you’d know that my hard drive on my Macbook becomes dismounted annually.  It sucks, but not so much that I’d go get another computer.  For me, having to take it to be repaired so often is a price I’d gladly pay for the lack of other issues I have with it.  49 weeks out of the year, my computer runs like a dream.

The repairs are covered under warranty, but it’ll take 3 weeks for the new drive to get to the Mac Shack and for them to replace it.  The next parody will be mid-March and will make fun ofTaken.  In the mean time, we’ll be throwing some hilarious Behind-the-Scenes strips your way put together by the man, JN Horsely III.

For those that want to sing along (you’ll notice I skipped a whole section.  There were too many lyrics to fit the whole song on the page):

Click here to view the embedded video.

Sorry for getting this one up late, people.  But it’s still Monday, so that’s good!

When I set out to do an Empire Strikes Back joke, the first thought that popped into my head was the “Fuck you, DAD!!!” line from Reno 911.  I was going to have Darth Vader try and convince Luke they should spend some quality time together.  THEN, I thought what it would be like if Luke imagined Vader as a good father.  THEN the image of two armless cats high-fiving each other from VGCats popped into my head.  Mix ‘em all together and this is what you get.

Edit: the strip’s up now!  Check it out!

It’s crazy how your preconceived notions of a film that you watch as a kid turn out to be something entirely different when you’re older.  Like, I remember Forrest Gump being a boring, long-ass movie about a chocolate-loving retard when I was an 8 year old.  Watching through it again before drawing this strip made me see it for the wonderful film that it is.  I feel like I’ve finally matured…*sniff*

Anyway, I ran into a few snags when attempting to draw/write this comic.  Here’s some Forrest Gump facts I learned:

1) The line in the movie is, “Life was like a box of chocalates,” instead of “is like a box of chocolates.”

2) Forrest Gump’s mother doesn’t have a name.  She’s always referred to “Mrs. Gump” or “Momma” (by the way, I refuse to spell it “mama.”  When I see that, my Mexican side wants to pronounce it the Spanish way: maw-MAW instead of MAW-muh).

3) The film never shows where Forrest’s mom is buried.  I could have sworn she had a headstone next to Jenny at their house, but nope.  After that scene where he talks to her on her death bed, she’s never seen or mentioned again.  So I just kind of made up that she had a headstone on their land, somewhere near the house, but away from where Jenny’s would be.

I was a big fan of Sin City back in the day.  Nerdishly, I even took my trade paperbacks with me to see this flick opening day, thinking I would be able to follow along since the film followed the book so closely.  I ended up just tucking them under my seat in fear of ridicule, mainly from my ex-girlfriend.

Most people in the theater laughed at the absurdity of Marv’s nigh invulnerability.  I was confused as to why at first, because unlike them I knew these stories didn’t take place in reality.  In Frank Miller’s world, a man can get shot eleventy times, mowed down with a car, and still be able to dust himself off and castrate you.

And while that’s badass in the comics, on celluloid it didn’t quite translate well.  I think most people like to see their film heroes at bit more vulnerable, so I decided to run with that.  So here you go, people who went to the 8:00 showing at AMC Theater’s Flatiron Crossing 14 on April 1, 2005.  Here’s your vulnerable hero.  I hope you’re happy.

To all you trekkers out there:  I’m sorry.  Sometimes I even hate myself a little.  This was by far my favorite movie of 2009.

But hey, it’s funny, I think.  And we haven’t done a gay joke in forever, not since the Terminator strip (and that wasn’t really gay, just gay-ish).  Just think of this as an alternate alternate reality.  Wherein Spock Prime is a jerk.

… now that I think of it… I should’ve given Spock Prime a goatee.  Dammit!  Now I hate myself even more.

What’s this?  Is that JN in the bushes?  Yes, unfortunately.  I’d like to say it’s Jennifer Connelly in there peeping at the “goods” but instead it’s that guy in charge of y2cl.net with the questionable sexual orientation.

With Jon currently in South Korea, I went to JN to see if he wanted to help run For The Reels and end its hiatus, since I was a fan of his work and he made no secret of the fact he wanted to add FTR to his network of comics.  The result is this new comicpress site you see here.  So everybody do me a favor and thank the awesome JN ’cause without him we’d currently be without a site.

And even though he’s in South Korea, Jon still sends me emails with strip ideas regularly.  Expect to see his spoof on Forest Gump soon.

Read the comic again with this video playing.

Click here to view the embedded video.

If you’ve been reading For The Reels for a while, you’d know that Jon and I originally said that we would wait to parody a film until it’s DVD release.  That way we give a chance to those who haven’t seen it in theaters to see it before we spoil anything.  In this case, Avatar has only been out for about two-and-a-half weeks.  JN and I figured in our recent podcast that we could make an exception for huge event movies  (I mean, it’s not like people haven’t gone to see it, it’s made over $1 billion worldwide already).

Though we’re not going operate like Theater Hopper or Joe Loves Crappy Movies (awesome as they are) and riff on movies currently in theaters that people – or maybe, I – don’t care about.  For The Reels is about all great movies, old or new.  We’re still gonna do the old classics.  We’re still gonna do the more recent classics.  Avatar was so good, I’d consider it a new classic.

So when I first saw the movie and sat down to think of a joke, two thoughts popped into my head.  #1: Jake Sully probably had a wet dream in his machine when he mated with Neytiri.  It’s a funny concept but I wanted to draw something more visually engaging, as the movie was a visual masterpiece.  So I went with #2: At night, Pandora lights up like it’s under a black light.  People who go to raves would have a freakin’ awesome time there.

All the props go to my friend Sean for this joke.

It’s not often I hear a parody suggestion I like.  Those who know me will often throw ideas my way on what film we should spoof next/what the joke should be/what this week’s joke should’ve been.  Often they’re along the lines of: “… and then he shoots him in the face!  Ha!” or, “… and then he punches him in the dick!  Lolz!”

It’s… annoying.  At best.  Because me, being me, automatically think my ideas are divine revelations sent from the heavens to share with you all.  When I decided to spoof E.T., I got a rude awakening.

My initial thoughts were along the lines of, “What if E.T. dialed the wrong number when phoning home?”  It was a decent concept, but not as good as Sean’s.  He took the “ouch” moment from the movie and applied from Elliot’s finger to his balls.  I mixed it up a bit by having it take place during the flying bike scene and, ta-daa!: our first joke we totally stole from an outside, non-FTR source.

Thanks, Sean.  Just don’t expect any money or anything.

There were a lot of different adaptations of this story to choose from.  The version I knew the best was the Animaniacs cartoon.  J wanted the Mickey Mouse version.  Jon wanted the Patrick Stewart version.  The George C. Scott film was also suggested.  In the end, I went with the classic 1951 version because after doing some research, I found out it was one of the most revered films among fans of the novel that wasn’t a made-for-television movie.  So I watched that one and loved it.  It’s definitely up there next to It’s a Wonderful Life and Bad Santa as one of my favorite holiday films.